Get Offa My Case: Godly Parenting of an Angry Teen

“I truly hope that Get Offa My Case will have a wide and critical reading in thousands of Christian households where the family is currently being held hostage by the tyranny of angry, out of control teens whose behavior dishonors Christ and terrorizes their parents. The practical, biblical and transparent advice Rick offers will be a ready and welcome help to those who find themselves exasperated and paralyzed by the horrific impact of a teen without boundaries and without direction. It will prove to be a roadmap and manual to all parents who seek to provide biblical discipline to their struggling teens, offering insight that is both fair and illuminating, but by no means offer pat answers and cookie-cutter solutions to difficult problems. Rick's book applies the truth of discipleship to the gnawing and oftentimes brutal emotional situation of raising an angry teen. I highly recommend it for anyone wanting to learn what it means to apply biblical discipline in a way that honors God and is willing to take on directly the behavior of an angry teen child—someone who desperately needs their parents to be courageous as they help them make it through the deep waters of anger, disrespect, and confusion.”– Rev. Dr. Don L. Davis, Director, The Urban Ministry Institute, Vice President of Leadership Development, World Impact, Inc.

“What I find especially important throughout Rick’s text is his consistent and persistent challenge to engage our angry teens with the truth of their attitudes and action. He counsels us neither to neglect or be overwhelmed by our teens, but to confront them with their decisions and conduct, and offers insight in how we might discipline them fairly and consistently, despite their accusations and protestations of our hypocrisy and failure. He is aware that grace is needed by all in the family situation, and therefore, he exhorts parents to be both humble and transparent as they seek to reclaim their children for Christ. His clear appeal to forgiveness, mutual accountability, and maturity makes this more than simply a how–to book for parents who want to ‘fix’ their angry teens while ignoring their own need for growth and transformation. For Rick, the power of biblical discipline (a discipline for God which Rick says is positive, progressive, and painful) applies to all in the household. We all must learn what it means to live as believers under the reign of Christ, answerable for our attitudes and decisions. And, he emphasizes rightly that, if we are both willing and repentant, God can actually transform the angry, recalcitrant teen into a person who glorifies God as they learn the strength of discipline, responsibility, and consequences for their behavior, whether it is submissive and obedient, or angry and disrespectful.

“As one who has raised three teens (all of whom had their share of angry, recalcitrant phases) I find Get Offa My Case extremely valuable in its advocacy of a practical, challenging love, one which allows the teen to experience the fruits of their bad decisions in fair discipline, which Rick illustrates with the motif of ‘deep waters.’ Each part of the text moves the reader into greater levels of insight and action based on the idea of keeping one’s footing in rough waters (Part 1), shepherding them into deep waters (Part 2), allowing the angry teen to actually sink (not drown) in deep waters (Part 3), and finally a moving recital on their journey in lessons learned in their own pilgrimage in ‘Our Story’ (Part 4). Each part provides practical insight into sound biblical encouragement as a family, as parents courageously confront an angry teen, understanding that the word, God’s promise, and believing prayer can provide them with sufficient wisdom to not be a victim to the teen’s sinful and counterproductive behavior. His book will definitely reinforce the notion that we are engaged in spiritual warfare for the minds and hearts of our teens. Victory is our legacy, but we will need to engage our situations as both priests and warriors, knowing fully that Jesus as our High Priest and Lord is both aware and willing to provide the mercy and grace to help us as we lead our teens to freedom.

“Recently, Rick Horne has become a valued personal colleague in training urban leaders, preparing them for the challenge of ministering the love of Christ in Christian community in neighborhoods marked by rejection, hostility, and violence. His decades of experience in counseling has aptly provided him with the wisdom and grace to write a wonderfully practical text like Get Offa My Case: How to Hold Angry Uncooperative Teens Accountable. With deftness and sensitivity, Rick zeros in on a situation which has been reproduced in tens of thousands of Christian households: a family being held hostage by a disobedient, angry, and recalcitrant teen who is controlling and dictating the family’s life together. With keen insight, he weaves each part of the text with advice based on solid biblical insight and a firm compassion designed to help the teen come face to face with their own self–destructive efforts.

“Being perplexed is a natural state for many parents, especially for parents of angry, defiant adolescents. Sometimes this kind of parenting feels akin to keeping a small barge afloat in the midst of a ferocious storm. Dr. Horne has had to sail those waters himself so he speaks from experience when he shares what he learned during this process. His words are permeated with the wisdom of Proverbs, and his personal examples instead of being self–serving only accentuate the text's biblical framework. This is an instructive book, but also one which provides the reader with the best of comforts: the hope of the Gospel. I highly recommend it.”